Thursday Hooray, Thursday dismay

It was a crazy night. So crazy I'm ending up blogging at a friend's place to stay awake for work tomorrow. Maybe a bit too crazy, but since I crashed his place, it has mellowed. And I'm kinda irritated cause I blew off 40 on Euro. I guessed Spain-Russia would be high scoring but I was a goal short from recouping my losses. Oh what the heck, I'm swearing off betting for the rest of the tournament though. Finals are going to be hard to predict.

I hoped I didn't cross the line though. Things can get to be quite a messy mix. That being said, I don't think I'm wrong.

Hm, I met a bloke from Beslan, who witnessed some of the children die in the attack on the school. Ruslan or something his name. And respect to him cause he did seem to at least have some kind of definition that ought to demarcate one's life as mentioned in the last post. I hope I'll discover a greater clarity with respect to my boundaries. Then at least in craziness there will be some kind of lucidness for me to hold on to.

Shoes

The ones which I have filled, those that I filled but fail, those that I've failed to fill. And as we grow older, they multiply, we've got more to fill, and they are bigger and more intimidating.

I don't know how I suddenly got pensive, but as I was squirming on my bed, unable to sleep with my biological clock still a mess from Euro, I found myself looking back a bit. Particularly at the the failed ones, and one very pointed and abject failure (in my book at least).

And it seems, as far as it is possible, that it is important that one just not jump into the roles life or circumstances may thrust upon us hazy. And on top of all of that, I guess how successful we are is very much based on how bold we are to extend what the scope of this roles may mean to us and at the same time try to do whatever it takes to fulfill it.

I guess things are a bit more complicated in that we keep adjusting the boundaries of such with our experiences. But I guess it is important that I have boundaries more definitive. As of now, it is a little too vague. So hopefully the fuzziness will ebb away and I'll be bold.

And I'm quite look forward to Monday.

Raw is Law

I'm having so much fun in Innova I at times wonder if law is really the right way to go. And I think that's kind of scary. But the truth is, I have no idea what I want to do with my life. So I'm still all for trying out the whole law deal, which is a lot more lucrative as compared to teaching. haha, so I'm a money grubber, but no one's going to complain if there's abit more dough in the bank.

Bali

Save e 15 minuites I spent in Bali trying to think of a retort to Robin posing as some lame duck masseuse (uh huh, Karmella the Balinese masseuse does not exist, the real Karmella is spelt with a C and is infinitely less dodgy than his persona, muaha!), it was awesome. Ok, there were the drug pushers and all, but the scenery, the chillness, and the little moments of zen (which led to some smses to people back home) at some reggae club or at the 60s bar by the beach was incredible. I shall be back there in due time.

Oh, the one catch is that my long hair makes me look damn indon, and I get fucking checked before I go to the foreigners free-entry clubs (which is quite fucked up a policy).

the beach

the chow. ooh!

the sunset

random beach shot

awwwww :)

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